The gem and the rock

For so many years I jumped from one bad relationship to the next. I would meet this amazing person who had all of these good qualities that I admired so much. I remember one was this awesome artist with a heart full of poetry and a head full of dreams. Another one was really into charity and volunteering. This person seemed to have a heart of gold, which I found very sexy. While another one wanted to be an inspirational speaker and help others become better people. It would always start off so well. Ide find myself getting excited, thinking that I met this amazing person and it would never cease to fail that everything would blow up in my face and it felt like my heart was crumbling.  In the end I would find out that they either cheated on me, stole from me, lied about everything, or worse-tried to kill me.

I remember wondering if there was anyone out there that would ever appreciate someone like me. I didn’t understand what was wrong with what I had to offer and why someone wouldn’t treasure that. I was loyal, honest, I cooked amazing meals from scratch almost every night, I would randomly give them gifts to show them how special they were, I am smart, told that I am funny, and very affectionate.  

But everything that I did was never enough and in the end I would be thrown away like trash, or I would watch myself slowly break, then pick up my pieces and walk away, wondering why. And even though every part of me felt like the victim, I still took the time to figure out what I was doing wrong and try to fix that and not them.

I usually don’t talk to my ex’s, (it’s my little rule) but not too long ago I found myself in a conversation with the one person I was with the longest and the one person who damaged me the most. I asked this person (whom I hadn’t spoken to in 4 years), “Why did you not appreciate me? Was I not a good girlfriend?” After a pause of silence, this person sadly responded with, “I didn’t realize what I had, until you were gone and I couldn’t get you back. After four years of being with other women, I realize how rare you are.”   

A few months later I was thinking to myself about all the other amazing women and men that I have met, who have gone through relationships with people that treated them like they were nothing. They have done for their partners what I did for mine and still were crushed and thrown away, like they were worthlessly disposable.    

So I thought to myself and realized that there are two types of people in this world… One isn’t better than the other, they are just harder to find… See most people are common rocks…but amongst those rocks are a few gems.

Rocks don’t need a lot of care. They are content laying in their yard, doing nothing but looking out for themselves and looking “pretty” in “their garden”. A rock will recognize the rarity of a gem but usually still treats the gem like a rock. How can you expect a rock to treat a gem any other way?

On the other hand, gems are a rare kind of stone. They require upkeep and care. Gems are placed in jewelry and do things like make others feel good about themselves. BUT if they are placed in a bed of rocks, they become scratched up and lose their luster.

Gems treat those that they love like gems. They polish and care for others because that’s what they personally need. But a garden rock--although equally beautiful in their own way-- will never truly appreciate a gem, because they will continue to treat the gem as if it was a yard rock.

If you are a gem in a bed of rocks, then love yourself enough to leave. Once you have left, polish yourself to a beautiful glow and wait until you find that one gem that treats you like you are the rarest diamond they will ever come across. You’re worth the wait.