Adult Bully

     

Looking at my social media feed, I see a consistent theme of stories about children bullying others and how it’s wrong and needs to be stopped. Yet what I find interesting is the lack of pointing out that we as adults are bullying others just as much as the kids are.

Let me ask you this… What is bullying?

           Now most people would say it is when someone says something mean to someone else in order to hurt them.

           Now let me ask you this; have you ever said something unkind to your partner when you were angry? Something that you knew would hurt them?

            Or how about this; when you leave comments on someone’s social media, even if they are well known public figures, have they ever been degrading?

            Bullying isn’t only limited to children. I see a disturbing amount of bullying going on throughout the internet and in relationships between adults.

            Telling your partner, “you’re stupid,” “a slut,” “ugly,” “fat,” or anything that intentionally hurts them, whether in anger or not, is in fact a form of bullying. Even if they did do something that equally hurt us, that doesn’t give any excuse to hurt them in return. How is a teenager calling a young girl a slut any different than one adult calling another a slut? Well the difference is that we as adults are the role models setting examples to the younger generations. We should know better.

           We are all guilty of speaking out of anger at some point in our lives. I certainly have, so please in no way think this as me pointing fingers.

           Now let’s now look at the internet. How many of us have said something degrading about someone (Including celebrities) on a feed? How is leaving that nasty comment any different from a kid leaving a cruel comment on someone else’s feed? We get enraged over children cyber bullying but have we looked at ourselves and what we say and do? Kids read our comments too, not just adults.  As with everything in our lives, that’s how they learn what is and is not acceptable behavior. Are we setting the proper tone for kids to emulate?

        If we are to fight against bullying, we really need to look at ourselves first. Before we speak, I encourage that we stop and think, “Will this lift the person up or help them improve their life in any way?”  If the answer is, “no,” then does it really need to be said?