Things to Keep in Mind with Abuse

Yesterday was an interesting day. I found myself in a conversation with a woman I hardly knew. She was a beautiful woman with tumbling locks and a slight Hispanic accent. As she spoke to me, I couldn’t help but notice that her large brown eyes told a story not of happiness and fulfillment, but of sadness and hardship. We somehow found ourselves on the topic on the relationship that she is in. She expressed to me that the man that she is with not only treats her with disrespect but also occasionally gets angry and takes his anger out on her in a physically abusive manner. When I asked her why she stays she responded with that she stays because she doesn’t want her two girls to grow up without a father and though he hits her, he never hits his daughters... at least for right now.

I nodded my head with understanding but then responded with a question. “Would you want your children to be with a man who treats them the way that your man treats you ?” In shock she looked at me, not knowing how to respond. She remained quiet so I continued. “You are an influence to your children. If you stay with a man who does not treat you with respect, your kids will see that and will take that as their largest example of how a relationship should look like. If you say, “Enough is enough. I deserve to be treated with dignity and respect,” and you leave, your kids will see that too and learn from it. So what lesson do you want to teach your kids? Do you want to teach them that if they reproduce with a man who treats them like crap that they should just stay in it for the kids? Or do you want to teach them that it is better to be alone and wait for someone who treats you with kindness and respect, then to be with someone who physically or emotionally abuses you? The choice is yours.”

I often hear people talk about how girls or boys that grow up in an abusive family will either get with someone who is abusive or become abusive themselves. But you do not have to be a reflection of your family and although it takes work and a lot of self-love, you can break the cycle and begin a new path.

Do you remember when you were a child and you spun around in a circle until you became so dizzy that even when you stopped, the world around you kept spinning? Well when you get into these relationships, you are the child, still spinning in a circle. You continue to spin because that is what is familiar to you. But once you decide that enough is enough, you stop. And although you are dizzy and often times don’t know what direction to go, if you remain firm and make it a point to take the right steps in healing, little by little, your spinning world will slow down until finally you are able to see a calm beauty around you.

Why I won't touch Pokémon Go

                So lately everyone has been asking me, “Have you started to play the new Pokémon Go game?” The answer is “no” and it will remain “no.” Don’t get me wrong, I want to download that game more than I want chocolate around my period, but I know the way that I get when it comes to addicting video games.

 Let’s take for example the incredibly awesome game of amazingness, “God of War.” A few years ago I met a girl named Vicki at my work who let me know that she was about to become homeless because she was getting kicked out of her apartment, due to not being able to afford it, and had no other place to go. Since at that time I lived in a town house with an extra bedroom, I told her that she, her 5 cats, and a pit bull, could move in with me until she could afford her own place. Within the week, she had moved in and began to set her things up around the house.

                The next day, I get home from work and my eyes fell upon a sight so beautiful that I felt butterflies flutter inside of me… a PlayStation. And do you know what was on top of that PlayStation of glorious wonders? GOD… OF…WAR…3. I kid you not, I about shit myself.

Quickly I ran up to the bedroom where Vicki was staying at and with eyes as wide as saucers I asked her if I could play on her PlayStation. I must have looked like a three year old kid on Christmas morning when she said yes, because I don’t think I have ever flown down those stairs faster than I did on that day. Now I have an addictive personality and I know this. Which is why I am not allowed to have a PlayStation in my house—it is my Kryptonite. When I sat down on that couch, I only got up to go to the bathroom and to get 3 hours of sleep, until I beat that game. Have you ever played a video game for four days straight? You start to go crazy from the lack of sleep and aching thumbs. By the time I watched Kratos stab his giant glowing sword through his own stomach I was at the edge of my seat with tears starting to form at the corners of my eyes. Yes I gave a standing ovation. Yes I know I am a bit crazy for doing that. And yes, it was from that point on that I realized I should probably not play video games because I get nothing done.  

So now a game called “Pokémon Go” has come out and I know that if I download that game I will end up being on an episode of “Intervention” after getting pregnant and selling my unborn child to be able to afford Masterballs. I already know that technology has taken over our day to day life and this is just another socially accepted addiction that I don’t want to be a part of. I truly enjoy taking a walk in nature without wondering if I will find Cubone in the woods. 

Professional Needle Stabber

                As many of you know, I am not one prone to using Western Medicine unless I absolutely have to—and even then it takes me to feel like I am about to croak before going to that. Now don’t get me wrong, there are many good things that come with using Western Medicine. Unfortunately I haven’t made good experiences and I am weary using anything, especially after watching commercials filled with smiling and dancing people, while in the background the narrator informs you of side effects including suicidal thoughts, bleeding organs, and the occasional side effect of spontaneous combustion.

                A week ago, I decided that I need to find a natural way to take care of my hypoglycemia and I wasn’t about to try the newest latest pill that may or may not work for me while giving me a side effect of growing a second head. Looking online, I went to my favorite website ever, “Groupon.” (If any of you reading this have not tried Groupon, I want you to know that you are missing out on life. Groupon is a magical place of discount services where you can frolic through expensive places, pretending to be rich, before handing the receptionist your coupon of a 5 million dollar discount. Okay maybe it’s not that extreme of a discount, but I have saved a *gabillion dollars using this website that makes dreams come true.) I found an ad for an acupuncturist that was doing 6 sessions for only $68 dollars and although becoming a living voodoo doll is not appealing to me whatsoever, I hear amazing things about the benefits from being stabbed with needles.  

                My first session I was nerve racked and by nerve racked I mean I was in full-fledged panic mode. I am not kidding either. I have a death fear of needles so after nervously ranting for ten minutes to the acupuncturist and feeling like my heart was going to explode from my chest, I finally was able to calm down enough to get out of the fetal position and allow the stabbing to commence. After the first needle went in, I realized that I had pretty much freaked out for a mere tiny pinch and I felt silly for even going into this fright. On the other hand, it’s mother freaking needles and those little shits are scary.

Once the acupuncturist was done making me his pin cushion, he turned off the lights and left me with the words, “Just relax.” At that point I looked like I was reverse planking, with every muscle in my body stiff as a board. How anyone can relax with a zillion needles in their flesh is beyond me but I kept reminding myself that I was doing this for my health.

I admit, I didn’t feel any difference after my first session, so when I came back for my second session, I let the professional needle stabber know that I didn’t think it worked. A few days after my second session, I realized that I noticed not only was I sleeping through the night without a problem, but my blood sugar was starting to stabilize. I just finished my third session today and I admit, I am pretty excited to see my health on the “up and up.” To anyone out there that is thinking about getting this done, you should give it a try—and by a try I mean a few tries.

*definition of Gabillion- pretty much a made up word that means a hell ton

Adulting When Sick

             

                The other day I woke up not feeling quite myself--and by that I mean, I felt like a Gorilla had played wack-a-mole with a two-by-four on my body, mainly concentrating on my head. As I opened my eyes, I realized that despite being sick as a dog, I still needed to go to work so that I can afford my Trader Joe’s addiction and if you have been keeping up with my blogs you will know exactly how bad that addiction is. Groaning, I looked hatefully at the sunlight pouring through my windows, while silently cussing out God for making the sun so friggen bright.

The day went by slower than a slug race and every minute that passed by seemed like an endless eternity of my body finding different ways to express its disdain for me. The end of my shift couldn’t come fast enough and by the time that I left work waddling to my car like a pill popping zombie, a thunderstorm had come, so I had the delightful time of strolling through the pouring rain like some dramatic movie about someone’s bad day. After an endless amount of bumper to bumper traffic and a mastiff that wanted to take his ever loving time to take a shit, I finally crawled into bed and came to the conclusion that I was dying. I wasn’t sure what I was dying from, but between my lack of hunger, my body feeling like I was jumping between a frozen tundra and Satan’s asshole- due to running a fever, and my aching body, I was convinced that I was going to die.

After napping and having terrifying nightmares of Donald trump chasing me, I finally wake up to a missed call from my best friend, of which I hesitantly return the call of. (Apparently I am not very social when dying.) Picking up the phone she greeted me with the usual tone of sunshine and flowers exploding from her vocal chords, neither of which were appealing to my miserable ogre mind. Gruffly I expressed to her that I felt like death and after listening to my symptoms and lamentations, she cheerfully told me that I might have limes disease or the flu. Neither of those sounded appealing to me but both required rest so I took the remaining part of the day and watched cartoons and the Home and Garden channel.

This is where life take a crazy twist and one of the 500 reasons why I shouldn’t watch the Home and Garden channel. After watching around 3 episodes of flea market flip, I came to the realization that I too wanted to flip things and try to sell them. Though I don’t have much vision when it comes to refurbishing anything and my carpentry skills consist of watching someone saw and hammer for me, I have decided that life is all about experiences and this is an experience that I want to have. So today is the day that I become an amateur carpenter entrepreneur and as Effie Trinket said in The Hunger Games, “May the odds be ever in your favor.”