House Hunting Gloom

             Lately I’ve felt like my head is going to explode. I, along with two other people, have been searching for over a month now to find a place to live that will allow my pets for a reasonable price. It seems like every time that something looks like it will happen, something else happens and it falls through. It feels like an emotional rollercoaster because I keep on getting excited only to find myself disappointed. I understand disappointment comes with the territory of being alive but after countless potential candidates for my move falling through, I began to feel more and more like I am shooting straight up in the air hoping that it will hit my target in front of me.

It’s not just the comments “You’re on the top of our list” and then no responses that get to me. It’s having to email at least ten places a day, only to get ignored, receive a big fat “NO,” or lead on like it will work and then the “I changed my mind,” last minute. Don’t these places actually want to rent their places?

The most irritating one that I have come across so far was a potential roommate situation that seemed like a great fit, until the man (who had a daughter my age) started giving me pet names like “Tennessee girl” and texting me good night after sending me several unnecessary pictures of him on his motorcycle. As this was happening I kept thinking to myself, “Why is this guy being so creepy in under 24 hours?” I personally believe that if you want to be properly creepy to your renter, you should do it after she has moved in and not before. Because of this incident I began to realize more and more that I am just not comfortable living with a stranger.

My favorite response that I have gotten so far was from an old man who was renting out his upstairs apartment. The old man was nice but believed that it was a woman’s job to clean (I bit my tongue when he said that) and had boundaries issues- he didn’t accept “no” for an answer. I had a few concerns about that because I don’t tolerate bullshit very well but overall it wasn’t too bad of a situation. After agreeing to rent out to me on a month to month basis, he sends me an American Greeting card a week later giving me a poor excuse as to why he changed his mind. Keep in mind, the day before he had sent me an American Greeting card hoping my dog has a speedy recovery having getting his testicles cut out of his body. I have to admit, I have never had someone reject me renting their place with an American Greeting card. Now here I am, back to square one, imagining slamming my head into a bullseye as I get another three emails of “We don’t accept pets” into my inbox.

                It’s easy to talk about positivity when things seem to be going your way. Which is why I am talking about positivity now, because things are not going the way I want them to. Here is something to keep in mind, things are not going the way that I want them to, but things are going the way that they are supposed to be going. Even though I feel a bit overwhelmed with this seemingly impossible house hunting search, I know that the place I am supposed to rent out is out there and when I am supposed to move, on the exact date that the Universe allows, I will move. When times get hard, take a deep breath in and tell yourself, “Everything happens for a reason.” Maybe this whole moving process is taking longer because the Universe wants me to spend more time with my family. Maybe this moving process is taking longer because the apartment that I would feel the most comfortable in, hasn’t opened up yet. There are millions of possibilities as to why I haven’t found a place and even though this process is an emotional maelstrom of hope and disappointment, I know everything is happening exactly the way that it should.